1
00:00:01,636 --> 00:00:02,262
Monkey!
2
00:00:02,313 --> 00:00:03,107
Squid!
3
00:00:03,401 --> 00:00:04,572
Kangaroo!
4
00:00:04,958 --> 00:00:08,158
I have no idea if a monkey could beat
a squid or a kangaroo in a knife fight,
5
00:00:08,188 --> 00:00:11,663
but if I admitted that, we'd have
nothing to do for the rest of the day.
6
00:00:11,693 --> 00:00:12,491
Monkey!
7
00:00:13,345 --> 00:00:18,345
Malcolm in the Middle
6.19 - Motivational Speaker
8
00:00:20,345 --> 00:00:25,345
Synchronisation par Dingo & Tyno,
Script original par Raceman.
9
00:00:27,345 --> 00:00:32,345
Forom.com, Life-is-Unfair.tk
& Malcolm-France.com
10
00:00:46,349 --> 00:00:47,923
A motivation seminar.
11
00:00:47,982 --> 00:00:49,158
For the whole weekend!
12
00:00:49,237 --> 00:00:50,402
Can you believe this?
13
00:00:50,466 --> 00:00:51,792
Like I need motivation.
14
00:00:51,958 --> 00:00:53,622
And they just told
you about it today?
15
00:00:53,652 --> 00:00:57,112
They claim it was in some "memo"
they sent me three months ago.
16
00:00:57,301 --> 00:01:01,148
So now, suddenly my job includes
weekend seminars and memo-reading.
17
00:01:01,327 --> 00:01:02,587
Can they really
force you to go?
18
00:01:02,617 --> 00:01:04,367
Lois, they can make
you do anything.
19
00:01:04,371 --> 00:01:07,584
Once you sign up for a job
in this country, you give away
the whole kit and kaboodle.
20
00:01:07,614 --> 00:01:11,581
Our weekends, our house, our kids...
we don't own any of it.
21
00:01:12,174 --> 00:01:13,720
Okay, everybody, dinner.
22
00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:17,450
This is all just an exercise to
remind the little man who's boss.
23
00:01:17,552 --> 00:01:20,012
They're just trying to motivate
me to keep me in my place...
24
00:01:20,042 --> 00:01:23,042
to kill any dreams I might have
of ever digging my way out...
25
00:01:23,531 --> 00:01:26,164
Oh, my God, it starts at 9:00?
26
00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:29,902
Sorry. I forgot
how late it was.
27
00:01:29,932 --> 00:01:31,482
Why are your fingernails clean?
28
00:01:31,645 --> 00:01:33,145
Did you clean your fingernails?
29
00:01:33,165 --> 00:01:35,085
I thought I'd try it,
and it turns out I like it.
30
00:01:35,115 --> 00:01:36,548
It makes me feel
good about myself.
31
00:01:36,578 --> 00:01:39,028
Well, that's enough of that.
It's time for dinner.
32
00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:43,329
Damn. Pack of dogs is
in the garbage again.
33
00:01:44,573 --> 00:01:45,790
Go away. Scat.
34
00:01:46,503 --> 00:01:49,303
You know why they like our
trash is Jamie's dirty diapers.
35
00:01:50,088 --> 00:01:53,945
If he digested his food a little
better, there wouldn't be so
much for them to eat in there.
36
00:01:53,975 --> 00:01:55,701
Filthy, disgusting animals.
37
00:01:56,560 --> 00:02:00,810
You know, Mom, if you
double-bagged the trash, the dogs
might not be able to smell it.
38
00:02:01,883 --> 00:02:06,633
Uh-oh. Reese just made the classic
mistake of expressing an interest
in something that Mom said.
39
00:02:06,841 --> 00:02:12,569
All right, Reese, since you're so full of
good ideas, why don't you be in charge
of cleaning up the garbage from now on.
40
00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:15,149
If he just shuts up now,
it might not get any worse.
41
00:02:15,487 --> 00:02:18,383
I don't see why it matters if some dogs
dump a little garbage on our lawn.
42
00:02:18,413 --> 00:02:19,913
The backyard's a mess already.
43
00:02:20,330 --> 00:02:21,630
Oh, this is hard to watch.
44
00:02:31,052 --> 00:02:32,853
Hey, get lost. Get out of here.
45
00:02:34,476 --> 00:02:35,926
You come back to laugh at me?
46
00:02:36,010 --> 00:02:37,310
You think you're so smart?
47
00:02:37,642 --> 00:02:38,910
I am a human being.
48
00:02:39,073 --> 00:02:41,612
I am probably smarter than the
smartest dog that's ever lived.
49
00:02:41,642 --> 00:02:42,940
Now shoo. Shoo.
50
00:02:46,128 --> 00:02:46,958
I've got a gun!
51
00:02:47,086 --> 00:02:49,286
You make one step,
and you're all getting it.
52
00:02:52,214 --> 00:02:53,172
Go away!
53
00:02:55,741 --> 00:02:57,415
Hey, that's mine! Give it back!
54
00:03:08,395 --> 00:03:09,937
Reese, where have
you been all night?
55
00:03:09,967 --> 00:03:13,417
I started chasing these dogs,
and it turned out they were really cool.
56
00:03:13,648 --> 00:03:15,714
So we went to the park,
and then we found a tennis ball.
57
00:03:15,744 --> 00:03:19,009
And I took it from Toffe, and then Toffe
took it from me and gave it to Rusty.
58
00:03:19,039 --> 00:03:20,059
And then we drank some water.
59
00:03:20,089 --> 00:03:21,797
And then we turned
over some trash cans.
60
00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:24,948
Then Lucky did this hilarious thing
where he rubs his butt on the ground.
61
00:03:24,978 --> 00:03:25,678
I can't do it.
62
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:28,232
So then we chased this cat
that was all like, "Aw!"
63
00:03:28,262 --> 00:03:28,952
Stupid cat.
64
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:33,930
Then we stopped at the 7-Eleven, and
I went inside and had a Coke while they
had some burritos out of the Dumpster.
65
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:35,404
Spike ate his twice.
66
00:03:35,455 --> 00:03:38,075
Wait a minute. You spent
the night in a dog pack?
67
00:03:38,203 --> 00:03:41,801
Yeah. So then there were these
squirrels who were like, "We're
up in a tree, you'll never get us."
68
00:03:41,831 --> 00:03:43,705
You're talking about them
like they're friends.
69
00:03:43,735 --> 00:03:44,898
They're just animals.
70
00:03:45,435 --> 00:03:50,835
Well, I'm sorry that we're not like
your friends, sitting around all
intellectual, discussing multiplication.
71
00:03:51,502 --> 00:03:53,483
You can't get into bed
like that. You stink.
72
00:03:53,513 --> 00:03:58,163
Hey, I got checked out pretty
thoroughly in that department,
and I didn't hear any complaints.
73
00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:04,584
Every one of you is here
because you're successful.
74
00:04:05,159 --> 00:04:07,677
Successful at letting
yourself down.
75
00:04:08,661 --> 00:04:10,181
Nobody's better at settling,
76
00:04:10,524 --> 00:04:11,840
making excuses,
77
00:04:12,556 --> 00:04:15,356
shortchanging yourself and
those who count on you.
78
00:04:15,917 --> 00:04:17,355
Congratulations.
79
00:04:25,496 --> 00:04:27,246
You all got here
the exact same way:
80
00:04:27,249 --> 00:04:28,549
one step at a time.
81
00:04:28,832 --> 00:04:30,167
Postpone that dream.
82
00:04:30,558 --> 00:04:31,738
Reduce that goal.
83
00:04:32,385 --> 00:04:33,885
It's just another year.
84
00:04:34,302 --> 00:04:35,602
It's just another cookie...
85
00:04:36,858 --> 00:04:39,104
Now you tell yourself
it's good enough.
86
00:04:39,845 --> 00:04:41,022
It's not good enough!
87
00:04:41,583 --> 00:04:43,726
You think you can't
help it, but you can.
88
00:04:43,756 --> 00:04:45,296
I'm going to tear
away the nonsense,
89
00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:48,214
the dime store philosophies,
the catchphrases
90
00:04:48,342 --> 00:04:50,969
and bring out your inner Viking.
91
00:04:53,014 --> 00:04:53,794
Scott Porter.
92
00:04:54,542 --> 00:04:57,717
It says here you'd rather not
talk about your recent divorce.
93
00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:04,889
Sorry I missed lunch.
94
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:07,303
I was at the library,
and I forgot to look at the clock...
95
00:05:07,333 --> 00:05:08,533
Do you think I'm a idiot?
96
00:05:08,784 --> 00:05:09,097
Huh?
97
00:05:10,559 --> 00:05:13,112
Do you think I don't
know where you've been?
98
00:05:13,306 --> 00:05:13,835
What do you mean?
99
00:05:13,865 --> 00:05:16,065
Did you think I wouldn't
recognize the signs?
100
00:05:16,338 --> 00:05:18,191
The clean fingernails,
good posture,
101
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,510
the cookie crumbs
in your pockets.
102
00:05:19,540 --> 00:05:21,190
You're never hungry
at dinnertime.
103
00:05:22,472 --> 00:05:24,094
You're seeing another mom.
104
00:05:24,810 --> 00:05:25,871
I don't know what
you're talking about.
105
00:05:25,901 --> 00:05:27,098
Don't lie to me!
106
00:05:29,621 --> 00:05:30,821
It's not what you think.
107
00:05:30,835 --> 00:05:31,385
Who is she?
108
00:05:31,474 --> 00:05:33,224
-Why does that matter?
-Who is she?!
109
00:05:35,487 --> 00:05:36,496
Mrs. Finnegan.
110
00:05:37,404 --> 00:05:38,580
It doesn't mean anything.
111
00:05:38,610 --> 00:05:41,814
A couple of weeks ago I stopped by
her house, and she had her iron out.
112
00:05:41,844 --> 00:05:44,885
She was just so nice,
and there was cake.
113
00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:48,842
Well, it'll be a long time before
you get any cake around here.
114
00:05:48,872 --> 00:05:50,201
I wasn't expecting any.
115
00:05:50,265 --> 00:05:53,065
After everything I've sacrificed
for you, all I've done...
116
00:05:53,224 --> 00:05:57,562
you come waltzing in here day after day,
reeking of her fabric softener.
117
00:05:57,652 --> 00:05:59,991
Yes. I like fabric softener.
118
00:06:00,056 --> 00:06:03,463
Mrs. Finnegan doesn't mind taking a
little time to stop the rinse cycle.
119
00:06:03,493 --> 00:06:09,043
And maybe it's nice to have someone
who's got more to say to me than just,
"Clean your room," "Comb your hair"...
120
00:06:11,437 --> 00:06:12,355
Do you love her?
121
00:06:13,927 --> 00:06:14,681
Of course not.
122
00:06:15,245 --> 00:06:16,139
It's just snacks.
123
00:06:16,817 --> 00:06:18,043
Oh, you like her snacks?
124
00:06:19,194 --> 00:06:20,945
You like filling
up on her cookies?
125
00:06:23,015 --> 00:06:24,515
You know they're store-bought.
126
00:06:24,957 --> 00:06:26,235
That's beneath you, Mom.
127
00:06:32,184 --> 00:06:33,884
Doesn't feel good, does it?
128
00:06:34,331 --> 00:06:36,381
Well, you're not
here to feel good.
129
00:06:36,423 --> 00:06:39,073
You're here to face the
lies you tell yourself.
130
00:06:41,383 --> 00:06:44,540
You can stop.
I think I'm at bottom now.
131
00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:45,654
You're not at bottom.
132
00:06:45,728 --> 00:06:47,577
I'll tell you when
you're at bottom.
133
00:06:47,794 --> 00:06:49,963
You think you're fooling anybody
with those vertical stripes?
134
00:06:49,993 --> 00:06:51,693
What are you,
30 pounds overweight?
135
00:06:51,756 --> 00:06:54,206
You might as well be a
thousand pounds overweight.
136
00:06:55,168 --> 00:06:57,339
Is anyone in this room
attracted to her?
137
00:07:07,471 --> 00:07:09,821
Do you want to know what
you have to do, Angela?
138
00:07:15,599 --> 00:07:16,003
Hello.
139
00:07:17,130 --> 00:07:18,224
Aw, geez, really?
140
00:07:19,479 --> 00:07:20,310
I got to go.
141
00:07:48,366 --> 00:07:49,989
Hey, shouldn't somebody...?
142
00:08:04,272 --> 00:08:04,858
Angela?
143
00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:06,951
What do I do?!
144
00:08:08,617 --> 00:08:09,895
Hey... come on...
145
00:08:10,329 --> 00:08:11,096
you know...
146
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:14,940
Yes.
147
00:08:16,896 --> 00:08:17,752
You're right.
148
00:08:18,927 --> 00:08:20,154
I do know.
149
00:08:21,023 --> 00:08:23,515
Of course I know.
150
00:08:25,155 --> 00:08:26,688
Thank you!
151
00:08:35,289 --> 00:08:36,401
Can you do me?
152
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,126
Oh, who am I kidding?
153
00:08:59,208 --> 00:09:02,708
Guys, I need a night off. I've been
out with you I very night this week.
154
00:09:04,665 --> 00:09:06,015
They really want me to come.
155
00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:08,371
Reese, this is crazy.
156
00:09:08,626 --> 00:09:10,448
What could you possibly
be getting out of this?
157
00:09:10,478 --> 00:09:12,078
You don't know
how good it feels.
158
00:09:12,293 --> 00:09:14,193
You know where you
stand with these guys.
159
00:09:14,223 --> 00:09:15,923
I've got Toffe and
Jonesy under me,
160
00:09:16,242 --> 00:09:18,119
but I'm under Duke,
Chewy and Spike.
161
00:09:18,835 --> 00:09:21,335
Scout tried to cross the highway
yesterday, so I moved up.
162
00:09:21,365 --> 00:09:22,765
And Lucky's totally the boss.
163
00:09:23,167 --> 00:09:26,626
There's no phonies. You know what a
growl means, you know what a lick means.
164
00:09:26,656 --> 00:09:27,810
You're kidding yourself.
165
00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:29,028
You're not one of them.
166
00:09:29,642 --> 00:09:31,542
You're just jealous
'cause I'm popular.
167
00:09:34,281 --> 00:09:34,912
Morning.
168
00:09:35,060 --> 00:09:36,551
Hi, honey. How was the seminar?
169
00:09:36,581 --> 00:09:38,722
Unbe-freaking-lievable.
170
00:09:38,798 --> 00:09:40,485
I haven't slept in 48 hours.
171
00:09:40,626 --> 00:09:44,190
The Viking guy had to leave
suddenly, so I stepped in, and I started
talking to people about their lives.
172
00:09:44,220 --> 00:09:46,722
And honey, I got to tell
you, I have wisdom.
173
00:09:47,706 --> 00:09:49,180
Nobody was more
surprised than me,
174
00:09:49,210 --> 00:09:53,401
but I did so well they have me
leading motivational seminars
for the next eight weekends.
175
00:09:53,431 --> 00:09:54,173
Wow.
176
00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:56,012
This is the beginning
of something, Lois.
177
00:09:56,042 --> 00:09:58,218
The bosses are seeing me
in a whole new light.
178
00:09:58,248 --> 00:10:00,097
Did they cross you off
the probation list?
179
00:10:00,127 --> 00:10:00,970
In ink.
180
00:10:01,929 --> 00:10:02,579
Morning, son.
181
00:10:02,693 --> 00:10:03,204
Hi, Dad.
182
00:10:04,252 --> 00:10:05,287
Thanks, Mom.
183
00:10:06,335 --> 00:10:07,582
I called Mrs. Finnegan.
184
00:10:07,971 --> 00:10:08,572
You what?
185
00:10:08,648 --> 00:10:09,551
She knows I know.
186
00:10:10,093 --> 00:10:11,593
You're never seeing her again.
187
00:10:13,258 --> 00:10:15,858
I can't believe you told
her we had an understanding.
188
00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:18,476
Morning.
189
00:10:18,549 --> 00:10:21,941
Reese, I need you to put your
dirty clothes in the hamper
before you leave this morning.
190
00:10:21,971 --> 00:10:22,823
I already did it, Mom.
191
00:10:22,853 --> 00:10:24,341
You did? Why?
192
00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:26,763
I feel bad I haven't always
pulled my weight around here.
193
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,494
I mean, you're the leader.
It's my place to respect you.
194
00:10:29,524 --> 00:10:31,262
Well... thank you, Reese.
195
00:10:34,069 --> 00:10:34,389
Hey.
196
00:10:34,568 --> 00:10:35,668
Good morning, Malcolm.
197
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,337
There's money on the
counter for your yearbook.
198
00:10:37,367 --> 00:10:38,717
I don't want to buy a yearbook.
199
00:10:38,747 --> 00:10:41,515
I don't want anything that will remind
me I ever went to that stupid school.
200
00:10:41,545 --> 00:10:42,595
how can you say that?
201
00:10:42,747 --> 00:10:44,447
Being part of a
group is important.
202
00:10:44,650 --> 00:10:46,025
Don't you care about loyalty?
203
00:10:46,055 --> 00:10:48,223
I think loyalty is the most
important thing there is.
204
00:10:48,253 --> 00:10:51,453
Well, I'm glad at least one of my
sons knows something about that.
205
00:10:55,744 --> 00:10:57,303
Hey! What are you doing here?!
206
00:10:57,597 --> 00:10:59,697
This isn't your house!
You don't live here!
207
00:10:59,782 --> 00:11:01,763
We live here!
This is our house!
208
00:11:01,929 --> 00:11:03,305
What do you want?! Huh?!
209
00:11:03,335 --> 00:11:05,277
What?! What?! What?!
210
00:11:05,686 --> 00:11:07,106
What?! What?!
211
00:11:07,566 --> 00:11:08,001
What?!
212
00:11:08,371 --> 00:11:09,676
What?! What?!
213
00:11:10,966 --> 00:11:15,438
You'll have to climb the ladder of
achievement one rung at a time.
214
00:11:15,962 --> 00:11:18,709
You'll never reach the top
if you don't start climbing.
215
00:11:19,641 --> 00:11:20,991
And when you reach the top,
216
00:11:21,572 --> 00:11:25,715
you realize that the
journey never ends.
217
00:11:26,963 --> 00:11:27,909
Excuse me.
218
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:31,320
If you're at the top,
how come the journey doesn't end?
219
00:11:31,321 --> 00:11:33,974
Because at the
top of the ladder,
220
00:11:34,588 --> 00:11:35,824
there's a car.
221
00:11:37,974 --> 00:11:40,671
The question is,
will you be driving?
222
00:11:41,425 --> 00:11:42,425
Or just a passenger?
223
00:11:42,648 --> 00:11:46,385
Whenever you let somebody else
drive, he might have errands to do.
224
00:11:46,513 --> 00:11:48,113
Where do you think
he might stop?
225
00:11:51,625 --> 00:11:52,665
The dry cleaners?
226
00:11:52,826 --> 00:11:53,326
Very good.
227
00:11:56,245 --> 00:11:57,050
Where else?
228
00:11:57,485 --> 00:11:58,200
Drugstore?
229
00:11:58,252 --> 00:11:58,903
Yes!
230
00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:02,264
Where else? Tim?
231
00:12:03,131 --> 00:12:07,574
There's a place you can go to
have your shoes treated so they
won't develop a smell over time.
232
00:12:07,604 --> 00:12:08,228
Excellent!
233
00:12:10,019 --> 00:12:15,948
Okay, now... what
does all this... mean?
234
00:12:23,299 --> 00:12:24,452
It means nothing.
235
00:12:26,347 --> 00:12:28,519
It means nothing!
236
00:12:28,992 --> 00:12:32,275
This is what happens when you
let somebody else drive the car.
237
00:12:32,517 --> 00:12:37,310
You've all got to be the
drivers of your own car.
238
00:12:37,604 --> 00:12:40,504
And what do you do if the gas
gauge says your tank is empty?
239
00:12:40,986 --> 00:12:42,443
Stop at a gas station?
240
00:12:42,475 --> 00:12:47,095
No! You keep driving!
You don't let anything stop you.
241
00:12:47,491 --> 00:12:48,986
Let me hear some "Vroom."
242
00:12:50,092 --> 00:12:51,280
You know!
243
00:12:52,890 --> 00:12:55,382
Excuse me, Hal.
I need to have bathroom break.
244
00:12:55,587 --> 00:12:58,718
Need... or want?
245
00:12:59,282 --> 00:13:02,285
I'd say need, Hal.
I really have to go to the bathroom.
246
00:13:02,643 --> 00:13:03,793
-I need to go.
-Me, too.
247
00:13:04,292 --> 00:13:06,986
So this is something none
of us feel we can overcome?
248
00:13:08,137 --> 00:13:08,987
This has us beat.
249
00:13:09,785 --> 00:13:13,185
Well, then, we can put our work here
aside and all go to the bathroom.
250
00:13:13,325 --> 00:13:17,267
Only there's no
bathroom in the car!
251
00:13:20,794 --> 00:13:21,244
Hey, Mom.
252
00:13:21,599 --> 00:13:22,499
Here's your lunch.
253
00:13:23,146 --> 00:13:25,090
Mm. Meatloaf Sandwich.
254
00:13:31,710 --> 00:13:33,064
Oh, morning, dear.
255
00:13:34,837 --> 00:13:38,587
Oh, honey, it feels so good
to be helping people take
control of their lives.
256
00:13:38,719 --> 00:13:41,735
Milton in Accounting called me
from the Motel 6 this morning.
257
00:13:41,832 --> 00:13:47,341
He had to leave his wife and kids, but as
soon as the Ice Capades reads his script,
he's moving the whole family to New York.
258
00:13:47,371 --> 00:13:48,006
What are you doing?
259
00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:51,927
Oh, I keep trying and trying
to get Jamie to use the potty,
but he keeps refusing.
260
00:13:51,957 --> 00:13:56,971
Those stupid parenting books say
to put stickers all over it, make it
a happy place, so I figured why not?
261
00:13:57,001 --> 00:14:00,247
I obviously don't know
anything about raising children.
262
00:14:01,167 --> 00:14:01,812
Damn it!
263
00:14:02,317 --> 00:14:03,767
What's wrong with these boys?
264
00:14:04,004 --> 00:14:05,906
Honey, let me handle this.
265
00:14:08,354 --> 00:14:11,766
You are a superstar!
You're not afraid of this potty!
266
00:14:11,830 --> 00:14:14,067
This potty is afraid of you!
267
00:14:14,233 --> 00:14:17,006
You have to visualize
your success!
268
00:14:17,593 --> 00:14:23,223
Now, let's look at the five lies
you tell yourself that prevent you
from being all that you can be!
269
00:14:28,271 --> 00:14:29,490
Oh, Hal!
270
00:14:35,037 --> 00:14:37,435
Reese, where have you been?
Why weren't you in school today?
271
00:14:37,465 --> 00:14:40,556
A pack from another neighborhood
was sniffing around, trying to move
into our territory.
272
00:14:40,586 --> 00:14:42,436
Me and the boys had
a score to settle.
273
00:14:42,697 --> 00:14:44,343
You were out
fighting with dogs?
274
00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:47,743
What is wrong with you?
Is that a bite mark on your leg?
275
00:14:47,745 --> 00:14:49,695
This little crazy guy
went after Toffee,
276
00:14:49,762 --> 00:14:51,912
Oh, man! And then Chewy
and Angel went down!
277
00:14:51,954 --> 00:14:55,033
So we brought down a couple
of theirs! Tit for tat, baby!
278
00:14:57,565 --> 00:14:59,605
Oh, we're gonna settle this
thing no matter what it costs!
279
00:14:59,635 --> 00:15:01,835
It's gonna go on and on
until the bitter end!
280
00:15:13,630 --> 00:15:14,410
They need me.
281
00:15:18,639 --> 00:15:22,511
$120, $140, $160, $180.
282
00:15:23,393 --> 00:15:24,485
That'll have to do.
283
00:15:24,543 --> 00:15:26,093
I'm giving you a
good deal, kid.
284
00:15:26,607 --> 00:15:29,807
I didn't get in this business so
I could rip off little children.
285
00:15:30,799 --> 00:15:31,931
Hey, you need a gun?
286
00:15:35,291 --> 00:15:37,823
Let's hear from some
more who aren't afraid!
287
00:15:38,263 --> 00:15:40,568
I'm gonna be a vice
president in two years!
288
00:15:41,587 --> 00:15:44,377
Hey, come on, he knows!
289
00:15:44,827 --> 00:15:46,762
I'm gonna get out of debt!
290
00:15:47,603 --> 00:15:49,485
Hey, she knows!
291
00:15:49,897 --> 00:15:52,910
I'm gonna have sex with
a member of every race!
292
00:15:54,448 --> 00:15:56,864
All right! All right!
293
00:15:56,991 --> 00:15:58,391
Now let's see who's next up.
294
00:15:58,632 --> 00:16:01,541
Gerry? Is there a Gerry
Morrison in the house?
295
00:16:02,653 --> 00:16:08,179
Oh, Gerry, it says here that you
turned down a promotion four times.
296
00:16:08,870 --> 00:16:12,780
Lady Luck smiles, but you give her the
old stink eye. Gerry, what's going on?
297
00:16:12,966 --> 00:16:18,499
I guess I'm just frightened.
I mean, I'm good at what
I do now, and if I start trying
298
00:16:18,501 --> 00:16:22,218
to move up the ladder,
I'll probably let everyone else down.
299
00:16:22,423 --> 00:16:29,371
Gerry, did you know that Michael
Jordan didn't even see a basketball
until he was 30 years old?
300
00:16:29,612 --> 00:16:31,043
No, no. I didn't know that.
301
00:16:32,014 --> 00:16:33,995
Who tied your tie
this morning, Gerry?
302
00:16:34,455 --> 00:16:34,915
I did.
303
00:16:35,030 --> 00:16:37,808
Somebody just came in, pulled
up your pants, shaved your face,
304
00:16:37,838 --> 00:16:39,488
combed back that
lovely head of hair?
305
00:16:39,518 --> 00:16:41,225
No. I did it all myself.
306
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:44,654
You did it all by yourself.
307
00:16:45,199 --> 00:16:47,410
You were in charge
this morning, Gerry.
308
00:16:47,412 --> 00:16:51,180
But somehow when you walked out
that door, you let the world take over.
309
00:16:52,008 --> 00:16:53,008
Why did you do that?
310
00:16:54,066 --> 00:16:54,833
I don't know.
311
00:16:56,277 --> 00:16:57,937
Well, I do know, Gerry.
312
00:16:58,526 --> 00:17:03,055
It's because you denied the
giant that's inside you.
313
00:17:03,495 --> 00:17:05,495
You two. Get down on
your hands and knees.
314
00:17:05,815 --> 00:17:07,387
I actually have a bad back.
315
00:17:07,489 --> 00:17:10,930
Is that your back talking,
or your mind?
316
00:17:11,032 --> 00:17:14,154
-Actually, it's my doctor.
-Or your doctor's mind?
317
00:17:14,597 --> 00:17:17,917
You tell your back it
takes orders from you now.
318
00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:24,489
Climb on top, Gerry.
319
00:17:24,575 --> 00:17:25,035
What?
320
00:17:25,125 --> 00:17:27,921
Climb on top like
the giant you are.
321
00:17:29,497 --> 00:17:30,357
Okay.
322
00:17:32,607 --> 00:17:33,624
I think my back is...
323
00:17:33,654 --> 00:17:34,834
A bridge of steel!
324
00:17:34,871 --> 00:17:36,321
How does it feel, Giant Gerry?
325
00:17:37,101 --> 00:17:38,022
Tall.
326
00:17:39,488 --> 00:17:40,813
Damn tall!
327
00:17:41,312 --> 00:17:44,131
All your life you've been letting
people call the shots for you.
328
00:17:44,161 --> 00:17:46,474
Well, no more!
Today is the day.
329
00:17:46,615 --> 00:17:48,928
You're a giant, Giant Gerry!
330
00:17:50,577 --> 00:17:52,762
The world looks
better from up here.
331
00:17:52,813 --> 00:17:53,810
You bet it does!
332
00:17:53,951 --> 00:17:55,765
And that's where you live now.
333
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:58,763
So what are you going
to do, Giant Gerry?
334
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:00,463
I'm gonna take that promotion!
335
00:18:00,527 --> 00:18:02,984
And I'm gonna become head
of Systems Management!
336
00:18:07,904 --> 00:18:09,214
I-I'm in Systems Management.
337
00:18:09,244 --> 00:18:10,562
Damn right you are!
338
00:18:10,626 --> 00:18:15,250
And I'm gonna take you off
these seminars and I'm gonna
put you on my team full time.
339
00:18:16,796 --> 00:18:18,108
I'm gonna work that department,
340
00:18:18,138 --> 00:18:22,092
and I'm gonna work it until it's the
strongest one in the whole company!
341
00:18:23,262 --> 00:18:26,776
And I'm gonna push my
workers until they've given me
everything that they've got.
342
00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:29,579
And then they can all say
good-bye to their families
343
00:18:29,681 --> 00:18:31,688
'cause I'm driving
straight to the top!
344
00:18:39,595 --> 00:18:41,346
Man, that was amazing!
345
00:18:41,523 --> 00:18:44,623
They won't be leaving any more
messages on our side of the park!
346
00:18:44,666 --> 00:18:46,216
Where we going now, Lucky, huh?
347
00:18:50,020 --> 00:18:51,420
Lucky, where you leading us?
348
00:18:56,063 --> 00:18:56,574
Really?
349
00:19:03,154 --> 00:19:04,186
You guys mean it?
350
00:19:05,606 --> 00:19:07,406
All right,
I won't let you guys down.
351
00:19:07,676 --> 00:19:08,507
Let's roll!
352
00:19:15,394 --> 00:19:16,994
You found him in
a chicken coop?!
353
00:19:17,183 --> 00:19:19,483
It's hard to know exactly
what happened, ma'am.
354
00:19:19,518 --> 00:19:23,018
He and his friends appeared to have
had themselves quite a little party.
355
00:19:23,033 --> 00:19:25,633
They just don't train ya to
handle a scene like that.
356
00:19:26,151 --> 00:19:30,151
The law's a little murky in
this area, but when we figure
out how to charge him...
357
00:19:30,661 --> 00:19:31,734
I'll be back.
358
00:19:40,051 --> 00:19:41,951
I never thought about
how it would end.
359
00:19:42,399 --> 00:19:43,949
It just felt so cool to belong.
360
00:19:44,189 --> 00:19:45,839
The important thing
is you're out.
361
00:19:46,004 --> 00:19:47,000
But my boys...
362
00:19:48,777 --> 00:19:50,011
They rounded us all up
363
00:19:51,494 --> 00:19:52,894
and then these vets came in,
364
00:19:53,602 --> 00:19:54,580
and one by one...
365
00:19:55,340 --> 00:19:56,190
They killed them?
366
00:19:56,260 --> 00:19:56,720
No.
367
00:19:58,241 --> 00:19:59,791
But they're not
my boys anymore.
368
00:20:03,022 --> 00:20:03,507
Mom...
369
00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:04,537
Dewey.
370
00:20:05,425 --> 00:20:06,217
I want to talk.
371
00:20:07,811 --> 00:20:09,607
I really don't feel
up to that right now.
372
00:20:09,637 --> 00:20:11,799
I know I hurt you
and I'm very sorry.
373
00:20:12,693 --> 00:20:13,543
Thank you, Dewey.
374
00:20:14,610 --> 00:20:15,610
But words are cheap.
375
00:20:16,307 --> 00:20:20,008
I wanted to do something that would show
you I'm committed to this relationship.
376
00:20:20,038 --> 00:20:22,138
I want you to know how
much you mean to me.
377
00:20:22,339 --> 00:20:24,837
I want you to know that no
one can take your place.
378
00:20:29,409 --> 00:20:30,894
LOIS IS MY MOTHER
I'm going back Tuesday.
379
00:20:30,924 --> 00:20:33,474
I passed out before they
colored in the drop-shadow.
380
00:20:34,706 --> 00:20:36,406
It's not that I
don't appreciate...
381
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:41,850
We are going down to the
hospital and you're gonna
have that lasered off right this...
382
00:20:42,538 --> 00:20:45,233
Okay, I know you're trying to...
383
00:20:46,447 --> 00:20:48,306
But what is wrong with...?
384
00:20:50,868 --> 00:20:53,499
I never imagined
you'd be willing to...
385
00:20:54,074 --> 00:20:55,543
But that is so stupid!
386
00:20:56,131 --> 00:20:59,428
Oh, look, they made a heart!